The Obscure

Hello everyone. I gotta say, I am kinda feeling my creative flow again today. But it is not the good kind, I feel very depressed. All it is accomplishing now is causing me to think the things I hate to think about. Every now and then I take a look at how things are going, and I see that I hate all of this. I don't like anything on this planet, anything earthly. and the only thing that keeps me happy sometimes is knowing that people who I know and love DO love it here, they do love being alive and they do love the world god gave them. but I can't, no matter how much I try, I am a christian, I know that for certain, and I love god and all that stuff, but I still resent the fact that he made me be here, as hard as I try not to I do. and that won't end, in my life all of my bubble have been burst but one, and I won't get that one confirmed or denied till I die, so I have to wait that long, because in my eyes suicide is not an option, I got nothing else to say, forgive me for sounding pompous. I think tonight is another no sleep night dammit. well I am out, take care