The Obscure

Good morrow, boyos and goilos! I am distressed beyond repair, and as my forced audience, you shall surrender to my will and read about the series of neurotic reasons behind my current mental and emotional upheaval!
To be quite frank, there wasn't a long series of neurotic reasons behind this particular upheaval. My only issue is that I have come up with a new phrase that I like to preface my writings with, I've used it twice on this here blawg, but I think using it on every post would take away from the lovely nature of the phrase. You know the one (or not, it doesn't really matter), it goes, "Welcome, one and all, to the incongruent ravings of the inferior mind!"
I like it, but I don't want to kill it. Alas, I am at an impass. Wait! The clouds have opened above me, and a piercing golden light from on high has burst through the dark mist that enshrouds my skull and illuminated a clever solution!
Phew, now that that is done with, onward to business!

I had a very restless night last night. Well, I rested some. But not a lot. I kept tossing and turning, although, given the violent nature of the tossings and turnings I would have to say that the tossing was more of a whipping or hurling motion, and the turnings were all-out spins. It was as though in my dreams I were trying to navigate and extremely difficult luge course at an incredibly high speed. I woke up with my blankets strewn about my room, my furniture splintered and defecated on, gripping one of my mutilated pillows between my fists and shaking it back in forth like a demonic bartender making martini, screaming, "HOW MANY MORE MUST DIE BEFORE WALMART IS SATISFIED!?!"
Luckily my parents called the New England Patriots to come and inject me with Elephant Tranquilizers before I brought about the apocalypse; but it is only a matter of time, my friends. The souls of the damned are a meal fit for a King!

Dang, I am afraid I have to go to work now, friends. Have a wonderful day!
*Edit*
At work now, there is very few cookies for me to make, so I guess I will be getting out early, I'll probably just go chill at tim's house for a while until I can get a ride home.